Badalicious Weapons Mod
Killing. Exploding. Airstriking. Human microwaving. Dildo bashing. All parts of the Saints' skill and weaponry - times talent. You as the boss have it all - so you may think. You may have owned the Syndicate. And STAG. And Genki's sexy girls and sharks. And aliens. And controlled a brute-sized Johnny Gat. But man, with these bitches you could have done crap a hell lot quicker.
Introducing the Badalicious Pack by Flaxix Armoury Industries, you as the Saints' leader have been chosen to get this pack of state-of-the-art fun guns before everyone else - everyone else meaning the hos who sex you up every night and the shop owners which you rob. And of course the average people who finds themselves dead because of one of your bullets every now and then. You open this box, and these weapons to own absolutely anyone with, will be yours. Oh but remember, you aren't the only ones with these weapons, you're just getting them first...
Ze Venom
You have to admit that the tazer you picked up earlier from Friendly Fire or from your 2004th cop you killed at 88mph is only really good for well - nothing to be honest. FAI understand this too, seeing as we have our employees almost kill themselves each day in the offices with our version of the gun compared to when we used the police ones. I'll just say "Screw it - I'll think I'll go with my custom automatic tazer that doesn't overheat due to a little bit of voltage.".
400,000 Rottweiler
Ahh, there was never many problems with this gun that lived inside the others and possessed them. Apart from it's hard kicks and slow fire rate. Well, I suppose about 5 to 10 people have just about escaped from your rages and slaughtering sprees - hurt or not by you. Well, that is NOT going to happen again. Ever. Period. Automatic explosive guns aren't really common at all, but you'll be making the raining of hell above crackheads, hos and pedestrians a recurrent habit. I mean, you almost literally won't be able to stop.
KA-10 Python
We'd both probably be even-skilled in a fight if you still had guns you used before you opened this box and I used these guns. Oh, and going back to old guns, do not, ever, take me back to the KA-1 Kobra. It disgusted me. Low accuracy and it's everlasting tendency to erupt more ammo from it's larger magazine plus it's lack of knock-back disgraced me and made me look as dumb as a damn cop - I'm quite the bloody opposite. But that is the exact reason I made this company. So I could get rid of the guns that came out of their maker's asses and make ones that were actually good. So I could get the WOW reaction and not the default HAHAH and YOUR GUN'S CRAP reactions. I'll just list them people down and swipe them all up with an infinite supply of automatic bullets that don't bounce off people.
Tek X-90
Ohohoh yes, the gun that I almost ended up dying with due to laughter. Laughter over everyone who I killed, maybe not even God knows how many I killed, and how many you could kill - with the Tek Z-10. But the Tek X-90 is a completely different story. Oh, but no gun is perfect - that's why you have like 6 of them. I assure you this gun will get rid of the low fire-rate, the power lost against fireproof armor/shields and their lack of ability to pierce the annoying armour and riot shields.. Surely one of the things on the earth which is near perfection above everything. How do you know, we may have already reached perfection.
D4TH Xplode
The predecessor of this gun was quite bad to be honest. It weren't too shabby. I killed not as many people as usual, but then again... Less DPS, very low accuracy and the ammo. Don't get me started on the ammo - it almost literally went NOM NOM NOM where NOM=x, and x=1 quarter of a magazine. And let's say MON MON MON is what it says when dual wielded, which is like half a magazine when you're using two of the things. Well, I can finally rid myself of that little burden with the D4TH Xplode. Oh by the way, it's not called Xplode for nothing.
Cyber Lagster
OK. The name of this new gun doesn't sound too nice to you does it - I know what you felt when you were fighting Matt Miller and he was lagging you out. I know what it feels like because I used the same tech to try and emulate a strip club with invulnerable, sexy hos and I could hardly move. Well, if you took this gun and put it into the cyberspace world, it would rip it apart and lag THEM like hell. Not you. Well, there's no reason why this couldn't lag the world with it's new-found ownage compared to the previous gun.
Grave Smasher
Right. Favoured by all the Steelport gangs including you, was the Grave Digger. Not that crap little Ultimax. But damn, it lacked a small bullet spread, rate of fire and the incendiary bullets that made you hot - because they set you on fire as well. Well, a triple barrelled, explosive, incendiary, convulsion-causing, automatic gun will tear anyone apart if you ask me. And another thing - it comes with an option to gib people. Hell yeah.
ASX9 Megultimax
Look, I want to skip past this gun as it came from hell; in the bad way. It was an abysmal gun that only really killed crackheads and homeless alcoholics, if that. It was worse than the S3x Hammer and Grave Digger. Well, Megultimax is the name of this gun for a very good reason - one that most of your guns probably won't be able to argue with. Automatically fired, electrified bullets in an endless magazine will make you surprised. It will only surprise your victims for half a second really - the half second in which they'll be still alive after you threaten them.
S7ZX Quake
Oh, the love I always had for lasers when I was younger. Every child had a trait for liking something like Star Wars or a laser-infested series of films or comics or TV episodes. Sadly, the old gun didn't quite satisfy my nostalgic, old love for one-hit killing lasers. Well, that is going to change - the Sex Hammer was quite bad (yes, Sex, not S3X). Well, in Star Wars there was never an automatic, laser minigun was there. I'll stick with this mad, automatic laser minigun which causes explosions everywhere.
Killing. Exploding. Airstriking. Human microwaving. Dildo bashing. All parts of the Saints' skill and weaponry - times talent. You as the boss have it all - so you may think. You may have owned the Syndicate. And STAG. And Genki's sexy girls and sharks. And aliens. And controlled a brute-sized Johnny Gat. But man, with these bitches you could have done crap a hell lot quicker.
Introducing the Badalicious Pack by Flaxix Armoury Industries, you as the Saints' leader have been chosen to get this pack of state-of-the-art fun guns before everyone else - everyone else meaning the hos who sex you up every night and the shop owners which you rob. And of course the average people who finds themselves dead because of one of your bullets every now and then. You open this box, and these weapons to own absolutely anyone with, will be yours. Oh but remember, you aren't the only ones with these weapons, you're just getting them first...
Ze Venom
You have to admit that the tazer you picked up earlier from Friendly Fire or from your 2004th cop you killed at 88mph is only really good for well - nothing to be honest. FAI understand this too, seeing as we have our employees almost kill themselves each day in the offices with our version of the gun compared to when we used the police ones. I'll just say "Screw it - I'll think I'll go with my custom automatic tazer that doesn't overheat due to a little bit of voltage.".
400,000 Rottweiler
Ahh, there was never many problems with this gun that lived inside the others and possessed them. Apart from it's hard kicks and slow fire rate. Well, I suppose about 5 to 10 people have just about escaped from your rages and slaughtering sprees - hurt or not by you. Well, that is NOT going to happen again. Ever. Period. Automatic explosive guns aren't really common at all, but you'll be making the raining of hell above crackheads, hos and pedestrians a recurrent habit. I mean, you almost literally won't be able to stop.
KA-10 Python
We'd both probably be even-skilled in a fight if you still had guns you used before you opened this box and I used these guns. Oh, and going back to old guns, do not, ever, take me back to the KA-1 Kobra. It disgusted me. Low accuracy and it's everlasting tendency to erupt more ammo from it's larger magazine plus it's lack of knock-back disgraced me and made me look as dumb as a damn cop - I'm quite the bloody opposite. But that is the exact reason I made this company. So I could get rid of the guns that came out of their maker's asses and make ones that were actually good. So I could get the WOW reaction and not the default HAHAH and YOUR GUN'S CRAP reactions. I'll just list them people down and swipe them all up with an infinite supply of automatic bullets that don't bounce off people.
Tek X-90
Ohohoh yes, the gun that I almost ended up dying with due to laughter. Laughter over everyone who I killed, maybe not even God knows how many I killed, and how many you could kill - with the Tek Z-10. But the Tek X-90 is a completely different story. Oh, but no gun is perfect - that's why you have like 6 of them. I assure you this gun will get rid of the low fire-rate, the power lost against fireproof armor/shields and their lack of ability to pierce the annoying armour and riot shields.. Surely one of the things on the earth which is near perfection above everything. How do you know, we may have already reached perfection.
D4TH Xplode
The predecessor of this gun was quite bad to be honest. It weren't too shabby. I killed not as many people as usual, but then again... Less DPS, very low accuracy and the ammo. Don't get me started on the ammo - it almost literally went NOM NOM NOM where NOM=x, and x=1 quarter of a magazine. And let's say MON MON MON is what it says when dual wielded, which is like half a magazine when you're using two of the things. Well, I can finally rid myself of that little burden with the D4TH Xplode. Oh by the way, it's not called Xplode for nothing.
Cyber Lagster
OK. The name of this new gun doesn't sound too nice to you does it - I know what you felt when you were fighting Matt Miller and he was lagging you out. I know what it feels like because I used the same tech to try and emulate a strip club with invulnerable, sexy hos and I could hardly move. Well, if you took this gun and put it into the cyberspace world, it would rip it apart and lag THEM like hell. Not you. Well, there's no reason why this couldn't lag the world with it's new-found ownage compared to the previous gun.
Grave Smasher
Right. Favoured by all the Steelport gangs including you, was the Grave Digger. Not that crap little Ultimax. But damn, it lacked a small bullet spread, rate of fire and the incendiary bullets that made you hot - because they set you on fire as well. Well, a triple barrelled, explosive, incendiary, convulsion-causing, automatic gun will tear anyone apart if you ask me. And another thing - it comes with an option to gib people. Hell yeah.
ASX9 Megultimax
Look, I want to skip past this gun as it came from hell; in the bad way. It was an abysmal gun that only really killed crackheads and homeless alcoholics, if that. It was worse than the S3x Hammer and Grave Digger. Well, Megultimax is the name of this gun for a very good reason - one that most of your guns probably won't be able to argue with. Automatically fired, electrified bullets in an endless magazine will make you surprised. It will only surprise your victims for half a second really - the half second in which they'll be still alive after you threaten them.
S7ZX Quake
Oh, the love I always had for lasers when I was younger. Every child had a trait for liking something like Star Wars or a laser-infested series of films or comics or TV episodes. Sadly, the old gun didn't quite satisfy my nostalgic, old love for one-hit killing lasers. Well, that is going to change - the Sex Hammer was quite bad (yes, Sex, not S3X). Well, in Star Wars there was never an automatic, laser minigun was there. I'll stick with this mad, automatic laser minigun which causes explosions everywhere.
![[V] IdolNinja](/forum/data/avatars/m/0/62.jpg?1394026296){kind=avatar}